Day 9 – Love and Family

Going on Year 3
Going on Year 3

A casual night out at a friendly Astoria bar, our MO if you will. That’s how we met and that’s how we’ll say our last goodbyes. Over the course of our courtship, Jameson has brought us together and torn us apart.

N has introduced me to The Saw Doctors (great music, check them out) and what it means to really love someone. This post is a little tribute to that relationship I guess. One thing I’ve certainly learned is that you can’t be with someone until you’re ok with being with yourself. That thought definitely transpires into this project.

I’m not running from anything. That’s not why I’m leaving. Technically, I’m looking for something… I’m not sure what but I’m pretty sure it’s not love. I have love. I used to think man met woman, they fell in love, argued over where to live, got married, had kids, hated kids, loved older-aged kids, died.

That’s not how we’ve been. We do it our own way, and it’s a little backward and it may not make sense to outsiders, but whether or not we “make it” isn’t measurable up to this point. It’s what happens after this. We’re not gonna play the long-distance game. No one wins in that game. The motions of the universe brought us together, and it will do what it wants between now and…forever. I don’t believe in fate though, I believe in coffee, kindness and keeping it simple.

N may have played an integral role in the last 3 years, but he has nothing to do with the next chapter in my life. Sorry, N, but at 35 years old, I think he’s still searching for what he wants to. This will be good for both of us.

Anyways, you know what’s great? Looking back on all the fun and fiascos you’ve shared with your friends, and tonight I plan on doing that with a couple girlfriends. A little Spanish tapas dinner action, followed by some rump shakin’ in some basement club. Girls’ nights out are always a blast. Shameless flirting, gossiping and those late nights are always followed by drinks for breakfast, known to New Yorker’s everywhere as brunch.

Nowadays, those late nights are also followed by the worst pain in my knees, lower back and feet. It’s funny that as you age the more money you have to spend to go out, but you just wanna couch it because even though 30 may be the new 20, your joints do not give a fuck.

And now, I’m going to meet my little brother (who is actually almost 24, not so little). We haven’t always been the best of friends, but we’re working on that. I’m attributing that openness to this project of redefining what I find most important in my life. Family is tops. It takes a lot to heal deep and painful wounds, but it’s worth it. This life is all about stepping outside your comfort zone, is it not?

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8 thoughts on “Day 9 – Love and Family

  1. Jade O'Faolean

    “I don’t believe in fate though, I believe in coffee, kindness and keeping it simple”. I love that line! Also, ‘even though 30 may be the new 20, your joints do not give a fuck’ had me rolling… Great writing Jenny! And all the best to you on your journey 🙂

    1. Jade, thank you so much for reading and for commenting. I appreciate that you’re picking up on the humor, and maybe you can even relate a bit. I hope you continue to enjoy it.

  2. DaveInOz

    Hi Jenny,

    A follow-up on information if you’re still serious in a potential move to Australia. before I moved out here I started reading the local papers and looking at the real estate pages to get an idea of where to live and what rent I would need to pay – yes, the Internet did exist in 1998.. First of all, the newspapers – for Melbourne theage.com.au and for Sydney smh.com.au. Most of the other papers in Australia are part of the Murdoch empire and not recommended! For checking the rents, domain.com.au or realestate.com.au will give you an idea of rents and what is available. There are also dedicated websites for shared accom.

    As for areas to live, I’ll stick to Melbourne as that’s what I know. The inner city areas would probably suit with good public transport and a young trendy environment – Brunswick, Fitzroy, Carlton, North Melbourne, St Kilda.

    Reading the papers gives you an idea of what’s happening in Melbourne (or Sydney) so that when you arrive you have a feel for the place. Keep an eye on the weather reports so you’ll know what clothes to bring and what you’ll need. It never gets cold here in Melbourne but winter is cool with night-time temperatures of the high 30’s, low 40s and daytime in the mid 50’s (translated to Fahrenheit for US readers!). Summer it can be warm or really hot, basically depending on whether the wind is off the hot continent interior or the Southern Ocean. The Melbourne weather forecast is here – http://www.bom.gov.au/vic/forecasts/melbourne.shtml.

    Hope this helps. Good luck with the decision making!

    1. Hey, thanks, DaveInOz! Your comment is so helpful! I definitely think checking out local news and papers is an awesome idea I didn’t consider. Luckily, I do know someone in Sydney that would let me crash on his couch while I figured out the next move, but it’s always a smart idea to know what you’re getting into. The link is awesome and as weather is a contributing factor as to why I am leaving, it’s something I already started tracking. Where did you move from? I guess you’re not coming back, it’s been awhile! Thank you for reading, and I hope you continue to feed me advice.

      1. DaveInOz

        Hi Jenny,

        I moved here with my wife and two young children from the UK back in 1998. I was on a two year contract but decided to stay. We got permanent residency and then citizenship. No regrets – it’s a great place to live.

  3. Face Palm

    Hey numb nuts. you’re not a kid anymore. Stop writing as if you’re a vulnerable dimwit. Also, if you’re searching for a job, employers ARE looking on social media and reading this dribble. What was once therapeutic way of writing is now a major employer thing to check for.

    Not that it’s wrong to make radical decisions, but you’re publicizing it before anyone gets to hire you! And under your real name!! The part about weed, that’s HR gold!! Your writing as if you’re unstable, and come across as crazy. Check your writing, especially since you’re a copywriter for fucks sake.

    Ugh… You’ll probably take the “haters gonna hate” route and dismiss what I’m trying to get at.

    Simply out, take it down a notch, will ya?

    1. Hi Face Palm, thanks for your comment. I’m not going to dismiss it, I’m not a “dimwit” and I’m also 100% aware it is out there, in the world to be read by whomever. The part about “weed” didn’t even have weed involved- I don’t even mention it. I don’t do drugs, if we are still even considering marijuana a drug these days.
      I understand what you’re getting at, and appreciate all feedback but there are far better ways to prove a point than call someone names and tell them they sound crazy. I’m not crazy, and if you don’t like my style of writing, that’s ok. There are thousands of blogs that would suit you better I suppose.
      I’ll check my editing though, make sure I’m not using excessive exclamation points. I seriously hate that!!!!!!!!!

  4. Gede Prama

    article is quite interesting and hopefully true happiness rays began to warm the hearts of us all, when we can share it with sincerity. Greetings from Gede Prama 🙂

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